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~ She Blessed Me ~

Back in October of '07, I was talking to Helena late one night about her life with Andrew, and his death. We talked about our ages, having triplets, her struggles and mine. We laughed and wished we could meet. We made imaginary plans to meet in the middle some day. Somewhere between Indiana and Pennsylvania. Somewhere that our kid's would enjoy, and somewhere that they could play. We planned our meeting as if we'd known each other for years .... and as if we'd been life long friends.

In reality, we were blogging friends, and our friendship stretched across the country. She easily entangled her life into mine, and into the lives of others ... and she was a great freind. I'll miss those late night phone calls, and the fun and laughter that went with them.

She was easy to talk to, and she had a great sense of humor, and a very serious side as well .... but mainly, she fiercely loved her children. Never in a million years did she think she'd leave them so suddenly, and so soon.

That late night conversation left me thinking about her .... thinking about raising five year old triplets alone, and without a lot of resources. She never lost sight of the important things in life. Her children came first in her life, and her faith never wavered. That night I made a little award for her blog. She touched me deeply ... and I wish she were still here, so when I think of her, I could pick up the phone and call her.

Here's what I wrote:

It's about reading some one's story that grabs hold of your heart, and after you've moved on .... you remember, and are reminded that you've been blessed. It's about faith, and love and hope for ourselves, our future, our families and those we love. It's about empowering women and standing strong together. It's about the fight we have in us to survive relationships, abuse, cancer and loss of loved ones. It's about overcoming struggles that make us stronger and who we are today. Simply, it's about love. Loving one another.

The very first recipient of the new "You've Blessed Me" award goes to Helena at Thrice Blessed Momma. She is the strong Mother of triplets that lost her husband a year and half ago. He died very suddenly and left her to raise their children. Her children are beautiful and smart and so lucky to have her as their Mother. Two of them have Cerebral Palsy, but Helena makes their life beautiful. She is a wonderful Mother and from my heart to hers ... she blessed me.

“From My heart to yours Helena …. You blessed me.” ~ Tanya Siekman (The Dairy Wife)

~ In memory of a special woman who touched my life ~

Words fail me tonight as I try to express just what Helena and her friendship has meant to me the last few years. Learning of her death today has left me numb and grieving for her three precious treasures who have lost so much so soon in their five years. When Tanya, The Dairy Wife, asked me to be a co-contributor to this blog after she broke the news to me this morning, I knew in my heart that although putting together this place may be a small gesture, many people will appreciate having a place to share and record just how much Helena meant to them. I am honored to be a part of this place for this special woman. It is with sorrow that we come to say good bye to our friend, but it is with love that we dedicate this place to her children: Madison, Zoe, and Jonathan.


Helena and I met as members of the PCOS moms Yahoo group almost three years ago, and together we became part of this community of mothers drawn together by two common threads – our diagnosis of PCOS and motherhood. As a group, we have seen each other deal with infertility, and then rejoice together at the miracle of our children. We have cried together at losing the people we love and offered each other a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen when we need support. We have shared our joys at seeing our children grow and achieve the dreams we held deep in our hearts as we stroked our bellies and prayed for their safe deliveries. . . . Helena was an active member and a person who we all could count on for support, encouragement, and love. She, along with her children, were a part of our online family. She is the one who actually introduced me to The Dairy Wife by passing on the award to me that was given to her by Tanya. (http://thriceblessedmomma.blogspot.com/2007/10/ive-been-blessed.html) She wanted me to meet another mom passionate about kids and photography.

When I think of Helena and the things I remember most about her, the first thing I remember is the sudden death of her husband Andrew and how she faced the pain and loss of losing him with an unwavering faith and strength. There is no other person in the world that I know who would have been able to be there for her children first in a situation like that; Helena was a strong mother who was completely dedicated and devoted to her children. I know that she had her moments of intense grief over losing the love of her life, but she knew that Madison, Zoe, and Jonathan were always going to keep Andrew alive in her heart and that living to raise her children well would be the best tribute to his memory.

She was a dedicated and unselfish friend who wanted to make a difference in the lives of the people she loved, and her sense of humor and ability to carry on an educated conversation never ceased to brighten my day. Just ten days ago (on Feb. 15th), I called her to catch up and see how everyone was doing, hoping to let her know she had been in my thoughts and prayers. . . . Wouldn’t you know it - she left me feeling so blessed to be her friend because she took the time to ask about my kids and what was going on in my life. We could talk for hours and I will never forget the conversations we had discussing motherhood, true love, and how crazy I am to live in the hot desert surrounded by snakes, scorpions, and spiders! Although separated by many miles, she was only a phone call or email away and became a special part of my life.

The thing I remember most about her was that she was an awesome mother and 100% focused on her children, their needs, and was an undying advocate for them. For example, I remember when we discussed how the school district wasn’t providing a safe means of transporting her kids to and from school. She kept at them until they did the right thing – install safety seats and provide a safe means of transportation. She could be stubborn and determined when it came to keeping her kids safe. She loved spending time with her kids; reading was an important part of their lives and one of her girls was reading before Kindergarten. (Boy was she proud of that!) I remember that she loved Puff the Magic Dragon and always did her best to expose her three kids to the experiences of a lifetime within her means. I can’t remember a time hearing her complain, although I know that she probably had reasons with being a single mother of three children making her way in this world without her husband by her side. Her heart was always focused on the positive and with her three miracle babies now in Kindergarten, she found so much to be thankful for.

On her blog in her last post she lists eight things she wants to do before she dies. . . .(http://thriceblessedmomma.blogspot.com/2007/10/my-first-meme.html) Reading it today made me cry knowing that Helena wanted to do and accomplish so many things that she wasn’t able to do before she left us – but – there is one big thing that she was able to experience before leaving all of us and that was to see her precious son Jonathan take his first steps. We talked about it a few days after that happened and she was crying and laughing as she recounted this experience. Something tells me that seeing Jonathan walk meant more to her than anything else on that list. As her friend, I am so happy to know that she was able to be there to see that wonderful accomplishment and I know that Andrew was also a part of her thoughts that day as she watched that miracle unfold before her eyes.

So many thoughts came to me today and these are just a few of the things I was able to collect from my memory and share in this small space. I will never forget about Helena and her life. I was so blessed to be not only her online buddy but also her friend. My prayers go out to her family and her precious children.

So grateful for this opportunity to share,

Gina Weeks, another mom blessed by three miracle babies

http://www.blogger.com/profile/03773943627570207441

~ A Jewish Momma's Chicken Soup ~

When I began blogging this past year, your Momma was one of the very first friends I met.

Visiting her blog, I felt the very special love she had for each of you, and that love blanketed you with warmth, comfort and happiness. Your Momma didn't just share her love with you. We were all blessed to share a part of that blanket.

Shortly after I started posting, I took ill with a virus and she posted to me: "Cynthia, you need to listen to your Jewish Momma. You need chicken soup. Preferably homemade, but canned will do in a pinch. The thing is, with canned, it's not made with love, so it takes much more of their soup to cure an illness. Homemade chicken soup works so well because it's made with lots of love. Oh yeah, and you gotta have more than one chicken in the soup, if you're really that sick. The sicker you are, the more chickens and love needed for a complete cure.This is true. Know how I know? Because my Dad told me so, and daddies never lie to their little girls. At least my Daddy never lied to me. And my Bubbie (Jewish grandma) told me that, too. So you see, it must be true. So - in true Jewish Momma fashion - eat, eat. It'll make you feel better. Trust me."

I remember reading her words and thinking, "My Sweet Jewish Momma, how dear you are to me." Later Helena posted that you three and herself had been down with the flu. She told how her homeade chicken soup was gone, as she had fed it all to you and made you better. Now she was down and no chicken soup on hand. She told of the chicken soup her Daddy made. This was not just a recipe of ingredients, but a recipe of Love.

Zoe, Madison and Jonathon, your Momma's love still blankets you in warmth. Her love for you will never go away, and you will always be comforted. When you miss your Momma, feel sad or lonely; make yourself some chicken soup; with lots of chicken. Just as I know your Momma's chicken soup was made with not just her love, but also her Daddy's.

Your soup will be flavored with not just the Love you add. It will be rich with your Momma's love. And smile each day, knowing, there are many of us who are making chicken soup, with lots of chicken, and your Momma is adding her Love to it also.

Cynthia Martinez

~ Helena was an Inspiration to all who knew her and to those who didn't ~

Madison, Zoe and Jonathan,

I did not know your mom personally, and we never spoke. However, she touched my life through her blogs. Helena inspired so many people without even knowing it, myself included. She was an amazing woman and an even more amazing mom. I read her blogs on several occasions.

She touched me - her words touched me. I was amazed at her strength and her unwavering love she had for you. She spoke so highly of each of you, and it was so important that she gave you the very best she could. You were given two amazing parents and two amazing parents were taken from you too soon.

My heart aches for each of you now, but I know that in the short time your parents were with you, they gave you their strength, passion and most importantly, their love, so that you could carry on without them and live the lives you were given.

Always remember that your parents loved you so much and that they wanted the absolute best for each of you. You were placed in my heart after reading your mom's first blog, and you will be in my heart eternally.

I pray that you will prosper in the life God has given you and that you will always remember that your parents loved you more than anything else in this world.

God bless each of you.

We love you!
Jamie Clawson and family